For me it somehow always boils back down to this basic truth

Hello family,

Here was my heart this morning as I prayed:
I confess that I am barely hanging on to Jesus with a shred of hope.  I'm beaten down.

I feel like giving up but I know that's not what I want.  I need a fresh start.
Lord, I need a fresh start.
I confess I'm arrogant about school.  I feel like I know it all now.  That my opinions are gold and my perspective is most unflawed.
I confess I'm just trying to look good on paper now- losing the substance of my learning.  Help.
--
Then God reminded me of the most basic truth to live by every single day:

Repay others according to what Christ has given you.

“In this, love is perfected with us ...for we are as He is in this world.”
1 John 4:17

Walking with God, knowing Him more, being with Him happens most in the way we love and repay others, especially those who we feel don't deserve to be treated with our love.

The other day I felt injustice rise inside of me because of a schoolmate who was rude to me that God wanted me to serve!  I was like why would I serve someone who doesn't deserve it?  I was like "No God, I can't do that, it's not fair and it's not right...I can't lay down my time, my money, and my effort for someone who treats me like nothing."  That's when God gently reminded me of keeping my eyes on Jesus not on what I see in the world.

“Love consists in this:
not that we loved God,
but that He loved us
and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
Dear friends,
if God loved us in this way,
we also must love one another.”
1 John 4:10-11

It was hard at first because what I see and what I feel so strongly screams "this ain't right!"  But when I focus my heart and mind on Jesus I see a different scale of justice.  I'm suddenly the servant in the parable who has just been set free from 10,000 years worth of debt...looking at someone who owes me 1 month's worth.
If I only look at this person then justice demands I don't give them anything  and that they owe me instead! But when I remember where I just came from, having been canceled a much larger debt...and being told by the King to do the same for others...I see why Jesus says that His one command is for us to love others the way He loved us.
To repay others according to what Christ gave us.
Because we will forget who we are because of Christ if we fail to practice living and loving as He did everyday.

Keep your eyes on Jesus.

 “He Himself is the propitiation for our sins, and not only for ours, but also for those of the whole world."
(Jesus died for everyone's sins so that not only are you free but the person who hurts you is free by that same freedom!  So to demand justice from them is to remove Jesus.)
"This is how we are sure that we have come to know Him: by keeping His commands.

Do not love the world or the things that belong to the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in him.
(The more we love the world the less we experience the love of the Father in our hearts)
For everything that belongs to the world — the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride in one’s lifestyle — is not from the Father, but is from the world.
And the world with its lust is passing away, but the one who does God’s will remains forever.

So now, little children,
remain in Him,
so that when He appears we may have boldness and not be ashamed before Him at His coming.”
1 John 2:2-3, 15-17, 28

Repay others not according to what they deserve, but according to what Christ deserves.  Please be humbled that He is always with us to lead us into this truth.

“For this is the message you have heard from the beginning: We should love one another,”
1 John 3:11

“This is how we have come to know love: He laid down His life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers.”
1 John 3:16

God Almighty wants to spend quality time with you!  And He does it through you loving others that don't deserve it because that's how He loved you.  We don't see God, but we experience His love most when we love others.

“No one has ever seen God.
If we love one another,
God remains in us and His love is perfected in us.”
1 John 4:12

So all this time my heart was focused on me, my grades, my time, my future, ....but I needed the reminder that God is in control man.
All He asks of us in the process of living is to love whoever comes across our day today.
Everything else is a distraction to steal, kill, and destroy you.  This is basic gospel truth 101.  Let's pray for each other to live in the light of truth.

We are going to make a ton of mistakes, and Jesus took care of that.  Our lives are not in fear of messing up anymore, because we have Jesus.  Our lives are now about sharing the good news of Jesus.  I once heard a quote that said something like people won't remember what you did, and they won't remember what you said, but they will remember how you made them feel.

When you experience the love of the Father how does it make you feel?  That is our calling in life.  To give others what God has given us....the saving presence and love of Jesus.


Love you guys.