Life on the daily, nothing spectacular, but pretty sensational!

Oh the woes of me.

       I have failed to keep up with my blogging promises, but you should approve that it wasn't all because I was secretly judging people who said "Which Wich" or in one of my extensively drawn out pedantic moods...that was only part of the time.  I've mostly been being very tangible; talking audibly, gesturing with my actual hands and eyes, walking from sidewalk to entrances, and thinking more loudly than I ought.  Thus the avenue to express myself was stolen by good things, maybe even better things? than this blog.  Unless you are from Germany and you happen to enjoy reading my blog.  In which case, I stand by my woe-ing to myself.  Oh the duplexity of life.  Cold and hot, hungry and stuffed, laughter and crying; I fall victim to the tumult almost minute by minute.

       (Say something meaningful)
...

...

       Darn sandra bullocks.  Everything I write feels forced and cheap.  Bumper stickers.  What am I looking at right now?  Dresses.  Yesterday it was so cold I felt like a corpse in my bed; cold limbs laying on top of one another, now it's only a few hours past and I see dresses.  I'm wearing a tank top.  I'm also wearing a shirt over it, but I contemplated peeling that off earlier when I was getting air pumped into my car tires...for free. :)  I guess Spring is here, but she's pretty flaky so I'm not going to expect her to stay even for the rest of the week.  Though it will hardly change my shivering discomfort whether or not I expect her to stay or not.  Seeing these dresses is good, but then I think about how hot and sticky it will get, how I will soon be pining for just one more bitter night as the walking dead even though I know that's not what I want.  This should be labeled something.  Characteristics are generally as follows:  wanting the opposite of extreme circumstances, mildly masochistic, agreeable only when sitting cross-legged indian style, loves sweet potatoes, and humorously observational only to self.  Maybe that's labeled a "personality".  It really does feel more like a condition though.  Like dyslexia or narcolepsy.  JmeGrey.  Oh that would be kind of sad.  A disease named after you.  Like parkinson's or Asperger Syndrome.  JmeGrey Disease: Perpetual extremes.

       Sometimes I think about California, but I have yet to miss it.  I miss my family and friends, but not all my family and not all my friends, but a good handful.  The rest are loved but just not yet missed.  Perhaps we tie ourselves more tightly to some people thus the farther we are from them the tighter those strings become until they are taut with the need for closer proximity, while others have yards and yards, miles and miles of string lying in loops and loose tangles on the floor.  You could maybe circle the earth twice, thrice, frice (?) and it would still be slack.  Doesn't mean you don't love them.  Unless you define love by distance.  Which seems illogical to me.  Especially in this culture of apps.  Long distance phone calls/ video calls/ emails, make communication so readily available.  If it were someone you were in love with then I'd understand, hand holding is a pretty essential stitch to a lasting relationship.  No hand-holding emoji would suffice.  Aside from the romantic relationship, it is strange to think we don't really have a choice of how long or short our strings to one another are.  So maybe they're not strings, maybe they're vines, vines can eventually grow but I don't think they get shorter.

       I do loathe cliches but I just have to reiterate that Nashville folks are too nice.  Some to the point of caution.  "Would you like a free tour?"  No middle aged man.  I would not like a free tour alone with you at 10pm even if this is an art gallery...because you don't have a name tag or a badge.  You're just nice.  Oh, but thank you so much.  (smiling big, looking so sincere; acting.)

       There are a few people here on their computers/phones/notepads all conveying something, and I can't help but assume that they are half human, in need of tangible comradery.  I want to ask them.  Inquire of them on behalf of the masses upon masses who read this blog.

"Excuse me sir, what are you doing?"
(startled, looks around.) {why do they always look around?}
"I'm getting some work done."
"May I see?"
(shifting uncomfortably)

And that's when I would expose them.  Then love on them.  Buy them a cup of coffe (in which case I'd only be able to do this to 1 or 2 people).  Ask them questions, even the really frivolous ones like "So, what'd you have for lunch?".  Give them easy agreeable statements like "Can you believe it's already March?  Time just flies."
I'd have to say stuff like that.  Ease into the mind, greying, greying, darker greying, and then if I had the patience enough, reach their black core.  This would take days, maybe weeks, months, years!  Depending on how well I was at the easing, and how many layers of grey they had pent up in their heads.

Or maybe they really are doing work or just watching youtube.

I won't know.  Because I didn't ask.

JmeGrey.