I come home to the Sun.

I read Psalm 19 wondering what it meant to have a "tent" set in me, thinking the analogy very ambiguous and confusing.  Here are my thoughts on the matter through biblical research mixed in with my personal understanding (the only understand I understand best haha): I was no longer just a dot (earth) revolving around the GINORMOUS Sun, as relying on the sustaining source of my (the earth's) ability to exist, but that I was now the tent in which the Sun had a place to exude outward.  Life was now in me, rather than far and exclusive.  The revelation of God revealed in Nature is so amazing to think about (Psalm 19:1-6).  Then the revelation of God in the Law is powerful enough to change one's perspective in that God makes those who are unclean clean because He's God, and He alone has the power to forgive sins.  God Almighty, like the Sun mighty in that all revolves around it, has now come to rest in the tent set in me.  

I was enthralled by such a closeness.  

I come home to the Sun.

We are close, as close as two people dwelling in a tent.

That's pretty irreplaceable.  

I come home to Him....every day.

The heavens declare the glory of God,
and the sky above proclaims his handiwork.
Day to day pours out speech,
and night to night reveals knowledge.
There is no speech, nor are there words,
whose voice is not heard.
Their voice goes out through all the earth,
and their words to the end of the world.
In them he has set a tent for the sun,
 which comes out like a bridegroom leaving his chamber,
and, like a strong man, runs its course with joy.
Its rising is from the end of the heavens,
and its circuit to the end of them,
and there is nothing hidden from its heat.

The law of the LORD is perfect,
reviving the soul;
the testimony of the LORD is sure,
making wise the simple;
the precepts of the LORD are right,
rejoicing the heart;
the commandment of the LORD is pure,
enlightening the eyes;
the fear of the LORD is clean,
enduring forever;
the rules of the LORD are true,
and righteous altogether.
More to be desired are they than gold,
even much fine gold;
sweeter also than honey
and drippings of the honeycomb.
Moreover, by them is your servant warned;
in keeping them there is great reward.

Who can discern his errors?
Declare me innocent from hidden faults.
Keep back your servant also from presumptuous sins;
let them not have dominion over me!

Then I shall be blameless,
and innocent of great transgression.

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be acceptable in your sight,
O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.

**side note: "Tent" was also "tabernacle" in other versions of the bible, and the Tabernacle in Israel was placed in the very center of the people.  Only those elected and ordained by God could come into the most Holy of Holies where the presence of God was.  (The farthest circle included foreigners/anyone that was not an Israelite, which includes most of us, the next circle closer in proximity to the Tent in the center were the tribes of Israel, then the circle encamped closer were the Levites who served the in the courts around the temple (and no other person could enter), then the only ones able to go inside were the priests, but at the very center, the room inside the temple called the Holy of Holies was allowed only for the High Priest.)  It was very exclusive and regulatory.  If anyone else crossed their boundary lines they would be put to death.  It was a powerful a sacred place, because it was the place where God Himself dwelt.  It was the center as well as the Protector, the Provider, the Healer, and the place where the people went to ask for forgiveness of their sins.  So for the Psalmist to declare that God has set in us a tent for the Sun, the Sun alluding to His presence which is everywhere, is amazing.  It's relation not regulation now.  

God has set a tent in you, and not far away.

After this, I started singing: "may the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to You!" over and over.  O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer."  Thank you, I love You.  I can do anything now that I know the One I love and who loves me is the One I come home to every day.

For someone with intimacy issues, this brought me so much clarity.  I am so individualistic and self reliant.  I try to do everything on my own, and I don't want to need anyone's help, because I am the only person who loves me enough to do what's right, but that's a lie proven with time and experience.  I am broken and full of sin, and I need intimacy with someone who can forgive sin and help me make my decisions.  But I have to know that person loves me first before I can trust them with these decisions.  God is persistent in showing me that He loves me even though everyday I storm out on Him, mad or disappointed, or even those moments I think that I'm hiding away so as to not bother Him, He see me, finds me, and continues to beckon me back home.  

Jmegrey.