Lights

  

some of my homegroup sisters

    I have made the decision to follow Christ, to recognize that I am easily swayed and blinded by the darkness, and that fear of darkness is futile when I surrender to Christ.  There is nothing that can overcome God, no worry, no lack of money, no person, no job, no anxiety, all of my fears bow down before God, therefore to live in fear of anything but God would be futile.  I do not serve my identity, but live to identify myself in Christ, giving up the things that give glory to myself (often for only a temporary moment) in order to give all the glory to God who is eternal and forever.  All honor and glory is His, and His alone....and He loves me.

       Being able to talk transparently with a group of people who strive after Christ is such an amazing thing.  I just got back from my home group meeting, and I don't know if it's a southern thing or a Nashville thing, but the community I have found in this group has been so good.  Almost everyone speaks up, and shares something that can speak into me, both encouraging me and challenging me to become more intimate with God.  I love how people are timid when it comes to being vulnerable, but they still do it anyway, and it makes the group just so much more real and close.  I see the different ways in which God has spoken into their lives, and the way He speaks to me, and it's always so fascinating to see how He convicts us of similar things so that when we come together to discuss our lives we all have a word from God to help each other find more of Jesus to make us whole again.  One person may offer encouragement, another rebuke, and still another passion to urge us further into that sweet Love.  I see people who are just like me, whether it's the part of me that's timid, self-deprecating, confident, or so utterly broken.  The way God moves in a room full of His children discussing Himself is soul-nourishing.  Even though in the end it will just be me and God when all is said and done in this life, it is a blessing to have brothers and sisters to help carry my burdens and walk with me, because after all I am only one person with only so much insight and resources, but when I am with friends who share their insights and resources it only enriches my life.  I want to walk in the light, and sometimes when my light is but an ember, it's nice to have fellow lights around to help keep me going in the right direction.

We read Galatians 5 and 6 tonight.  We talked about how we need to have right hearts, and be good to one another, loving each other with humility, while having pride in who we are in Christ.  I mean, this can all sound like Sunday school banter that goes in one ear and out the other, we've heard it all before, to be good, to be gentle, to forgive, but what does that look like in your life?  In my life that looks like speaking up and confronting a fellow Christian and friend who is doing something you know is wrong, even if that means that friend will be angry with you or not want to talk to you anymore.  It also looks like having an attitude of gratitude (that rhymes! haha...) in order that more joy would be experienced on a daily basis..  It looks like praying for the Spirit to help me have self-control when it comes to my bad habits/addictions and strong inclinations toward comfort and things that aren't good for me.  All in all it still boils down to realizing who God is and living with proof that He is God by not letting anything come before giving Him all the glory.  Seeing that nothing else matters, that nothing else will last, and that nothing and no one can come before God, but in realizing this also having full confidence in the fact that He loves you.  It is amazing, to be loved by God who holds the universe in His hands; who longs to hold you.  He longs to hold me.

J