Originality

Whenever a new idea or some epiphany begins to materialize in my mind, the first thing to squash it is the competing idea that it has already been thought of in the mind of another, but in my case usually many others.  The fact that it is likely not original, though original to me, is the rain on my ambition's parade.  

What is it about wanting to be original that I so suspire? 

Why is it that a thought or idea already produced by someone else becomes less than to me?  And not only less than, but easily let go for lack of originality.  Why must I be original?  Why must I be the first?

It seems there is, in me, the rooted inclination to be first. 

I never thought originality could be an idol, because to me it was just seen as unique or special.  But in trying to attain it I am realizing just how self inhibiting it actually is.  I want to be first to present an idea, but if I am not (which I never will be since God is) what does it benefit me to try and assert my originality if not only to prove to others that I am someone valuable?  Then by putting originality at the center of my focus I simultaneously place my value in the hearts and eyes of mankind rather than in Christ.

Lately I'm finding a particular annoyance to people that take a cliché and bash it in order to make another (more valid) point that supports their views.   This irks me, I think for two reasons: 1.  I'm somewhat probably just mad that I didn't come up with it first being that I hate clichés to begin with or 2.  I know how easy it is to play devil's advocate for any view, ANY VIEW.  I mean, even my faith, the whole buck behind this very blog is myself fighting myself in a rather comical yet serious battle of me vs. me.  Some might call that "body vs spirit" or "faith vs unbelief", but both reside within me and are constantly "duking" it out for my will to do, to be. 

That was a bit of a tangent, but to bring it back to the idea that the desire for originality could be an idol is best found in the litmus test of it's opposition.  In other words, if I put an effort to stop trying and wanting to be original and just continued with an idea for the sake of it's awesomeness to me, it would be more about the idea itself than about me.  If you haven't sniffed the epiphany yet, it's also a safe bet to say that anytime you do something good for someone beside yourself you are probably on the right track.  And therein lies the freedom from the suspiration, exasperation, frustration, all the bad "-tions" of what could just turn out to be God's original genius evidenced through you.  

Theology #1-  if God is God then...

He is the Original, therefore only in Him can you be as well. 

"Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell Me, if you have understanding,

"Who has put wisdom in the innermost being Or given understanding to the mind? (Job 38:4, 36 NASB)

So keep at it, whatever your ideas are, but check to see that whether they work out or not you do it because you want God to get all the glory.  You will get none regardless.  If the idea fails you don't get glory.  If the idea succeeds, God gets the glory, and that is because All glory is His to begin with.

Theology #1-  if God is God then...

All glory belongs to Him, and Him alone.  

"to whom be the glory forevermore. Amen." (Galatians 1:5 NASB)

"to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen." (Ephesians 3:21 NASB)

If after reading this you still find in yourself a "what about me" disturbance then I want to remind you that Christ gave His life because of His love for you.  As children of God we are the apple of His eye, and who better to have full value in than in the eye of The Original.  

"Keep me as the apple of the eye; Hide me in the shadow of Your wings" (Psalms 17:8 NASB)

For thus says the LORD of hosts, "After glory He has sent me against the nations which plunder you, for he who touches you, touches the apple of His eye. (Zechariah 2:8 NASB)

The unoriginal,

Jmegrey