Time debunked.

My subtle attempt at passing time peacefully and without fear of being unproductive has been nothing short of hilarious and wise.  

As a student the work is never ending, and there is always something that needs to be done (I have three reports of substantial length to begin, readings unending, and spiritual applications to ponder on), but what I find I need most is to be still.  I spent a good amount of time studying, and now I feel like I need to contemplate on my spirit.  Where is this taking me today?  What am I learning that I can slowly but honestly apply right now?  Is everything mostly in the future or are some learned things applicable to the now?  It must be!  Otherwise what am I doing but chasing potential?  No, I am not running this time, but I'm relating.  I'm resting in His presence.  I'm taking time to find the sureness of my complete self already in the relationship I have with God.  Tomorrow and later on I can contemplate my relationship with others, but today I'll take time to be swept by the Divine.  In my mind He utilizes the direction of my thoughts with scripture and reflection, and reminders.  Through my eyes He shows me the color changing sky and the pale moonlight glow.  My nose takes in the scent of oak trees and green leaves.  I hear the voices of people kicking a soccer ball, having pleasant conversations, and laughter...and a train somewhere in the distance.

All is well, right here in the faculties of my spirit with the Lord, albeit my stomach hurts a bit, but the body has never been on friendly terms with my spirit! Haha they seem constantly at odds, and I've gradually learned the value in their differences as well as the value in their respective pleasures.  The pleasures of the spirit and the pleasures of the body differ vastly within my senses, but one springs from eternity while the other is temporary.  That alone makes the spirit's pleasures far more, exceedingly, worthy of my aims.  The pleasures of the body, quick and familiar as they comfortably are, leave their trace of death upon me like the burnt scent that sticks to your hair and clothes after a BBQ.  (Only much worse) 

So the sighing and the sitting and staring all let loose on this 5:23pm evening, 30 minutes before my next class. 

And it's okay.  I'm not doing homework or reading or studying or texting or feeling anxious.

I am listening, smelling, tasting, seeing, and feeling the textures of God's presence here, right now without a future goal in mind.  Time is of the Lord, and therefore time with the Lord is a goal completed in itself.  

Where would I be without You Lord?  Always chasing and trying, but with You I am still, and all is as it should be...You rule over everything.